Brzozka is lithe and long-haired, with a flower-child vibe, but she wasn’t always like this. She grew up in Poland under communism, dreaming that money would offer her happiness, she tells me. As an adult, she chased that dream via a career in corporate banking, only to find in her 30s that she was burnt out and unfulfilled. She began exploring her sexuality, and says that at 35, she had a full-body orgasm that sent both her brain and body afire. Now she’s made it her gospel to teach others how to tap into the same feeling.

“The pelvis holds your masculine, sexual energy,” Brzozka tells our small group. “The brain holds the feminine, thinking energy. The key to liberating your orgasm is to unite them.” 

Unite them, I repeat to myself. This feels important, so I take notes.

The St. Regis has taken pains to make the staid ballroom feel feminine and intimate: there are white couches and piles of scattered pillows, as well as an easel which Brzozka uses to draw a diagram of breasts and the touch points that partners can use to ignite their nerve areas. But most of our work is done on the floor, seated criss-cross applesauce like eager kindergartners while Brzozka lectures, effortlessly toggling between English and Spanish.

Bring the pelvis and brain together, I scribble on the St. Regis-branded notepad that awaited me at my seat in the ballroom that morning, next to the tasteful vase of flowers and the miniature canapés. But how?

Brzozka wastes no time showing us. She lays down on the floor and breathes, first deep and then more shallow. Leaning back on her elbows, she lifts her pelvis—as if to take that trapped masculine energy and gently tip it over a ledge, sending it right through her abdomen to her cerebrum—and then wriggles to give it all a good nudge. She doesn’t touch herself. She just inhales, exhales, and writhes.

My fellow retreat-goers are awestruck. One of them wipes a tear from her eye as Brzozka, her breaths growing more urgent and short, allegedly climaxes. But I have my doubts as to the authenticity of what’s unfolding. I can’t help but think that if we traded our swim coverups for corsets and the tasteful St. Regis carpet for a candlelit table from the Victorian era, we could easily be mistaken for a seance, all of us convincing ourselves that someone before us has summoned a ghost.

Aside from me, the group is made up of four Mexican couples. Two of them, I’m told, are quite famous—so much so that I’m asked to sign a non-disclosure agreement before any teaching kicks off on the first day. Brzozka works primarily with women, and although her retreat at the St. Regis, dubbed the Pause and Feel retreat, is designed for pairs, I attended it alone. My partner stayed back with our kids and I didn’t mind. We’re happy but well past the seven-year-itch and now approaching the ten-year irritation, and I’ve learned that I can’t help him with his oxygen mask, so to speak, until I figure out how to put on my own.

“A lot of women aren’t even aware that we are all orgasmic, and these types of orgasms are available to us,” Brzozka tells me over breakfast on day three of the retreat. “Sexual energy is super powerful, and once you reclaim your sexual energy, it’s going to influence so many different areas of your life.”

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